“Our journey as human beings is not about following a pre-ordained path, but about creating that path. Life rarely makes any more sense when things are done ‘in order.’ Life makes sense when we are centered in our hearts and we let go of resisting how our unique journey needs to unfold in its own beautifully unruly way.” -Christine Mason Miller
Today was an important day and Mr. Something and I felt it all weekend. One year ago today we sat across the table from each other at a local Mexican restaurant and I tossed the idea of growing our family through foster care adoption in his direction. I had no idea how he’d react or that year later we would be anxiously awaiting a call from our agency to begin foster care licensing classes, a call that we were told that we would get within two or three weeks. Today marks the beginning of week four. I am fully prepared to be patient with system timelines but should an agency be keeping a new, eager couple hanging like this? It’s difficult to know where to put my patience if I don’t know what is “the norm”.
Despite the lack of a ringing phone we did a fair amount of celebrating this weekend. We spent the day running errands with a second agenda of trying to find something special for our second bedroom. It’s a bedroom that has housed an extra T.V., a hand-me-down couch, and runoff storage for Mr. Something’s clothes. The curtains, being held up with a tension rod, are leftover from my junior year dorm room. Then, they served as closet doors for the open storage in that long-ago tiny space. The walls are builder-white, the room has never been much of anything, but soon it will need to start taking the shape of an actual bedroom. A bedroom that will someday house our tiny humans, a space of their own in a new and strange place. For now, it represents something that we can do as we wait and wait for the phone to ring, for our story to begin.
The something special we ended up finding were books. Anyone that knows me, knows that books are my weakness. They are my favorite gift to give and my own overflowing classroom library is one of my favorite places in the world. Books can be genderless, ageless… the perfect first purchase for someday children that bring with them so many unknown variables. Without much thought I knew what I would choose, the simplistically poignant and positive messages of Todd Parr.
We chose It’s Okay to Be Different, which shares sentiments that range from, “It’s okay to be adopted” to “It’s okay to eat macaroni and cheese in the bathtub.” I’ve used this book yearly in my classroom and love it’s message. The second book is The Family Book. It highlights how very different families can be and finishes with the statement that all families help each other to be strong. Love! (We also plan on adding his We Belong Together to our collection as well but they didn’t have it at our bookstore.) It was a sweet way to commemorate this little one year idea-versary.
After a few more stops we ended up back at that same Mexican restaurant and toasted to what the next year would bring. I remember our conversations a year ago and how Mr. Something wanted to wait a year before pursuing the idea. A year felt so impossibly far away, and now here we are. We’ve had a lot of conversations over the last year and I can’t remember any that one of us had concerns so great that it would deter us from this path. Of course there are worries and the great unanswerable questions but it amazes me how right it’s felt since the beginning.
The evening ended with a trip to Home Depot to collect paint chips for our second bedroom. I have spring break in a week and it’s time to start turning that room into a home.