Running Shoes

“Slow and steady wins the race.” How long have I known about the story of the Tortoise and the Hare? So long that I can’t even remember the first time I heard it. It has become such a part of my schema that it’s no longer a moment in my life but something that I have always known. To say that jumping into the world of foster care adoption has been a “slow and steady” race is almost correct. Slow… yes. Steady? Not so much. If  you’ve been following the blog you are familiar with my recent frustrations with getting in touch with someone… anyone… about the process. Well, I finally made contact and was told that I’d be getting something in the mail the following week. Two weeks of sprinting to the mailbox every evening when I got home from work and this finally arrived…

Now, it wasn’t quite what I was waiting for but it was something I could hold in my hands. Instead of hearing from the agency that we are hoping to work with, this came from the woman that DCFS had put me in contact with. It was an overview of our preferences, the name of the agency we are being recommended to, and the name and number of our contact person at the agency. It also said that our contact person would be calling us within three days. We are at day eight and my phone hasn’t rung yet but I’m beginning to realize that I need to multiply any timeline I’m given by three… maybe four…

Slow and steady… It’s a great moral to a charming story but sometimes you want to sprint! You are pumped full of adrenaline, toeing the line, with nothing but the finish line in your sight. You fly off the starting block and somewhere in the middle of it all you reach a runner’s high where you feel strong and powerful like you could run forever. Are your feet even touching the ground?

It’s like in Roald Dahl’s BFG when Sophie has been snatched out of her bed and is being carried off by the Big Friendly Giant. He’s taking her to giant country, which exists somewhere off the last page of the atlas…

“The giant ran on and on. But now a curious change took place in his way of running. He seemed suddenly to go into a higher gear. Faster and faster he went and soon he was travelling at such a speed that the landscape became blurred. The wind stung Sophie’s cheeks. It made her eyes water. It whipped her head back and whistled in her ears. She could no longer feel the giant’s feet touching the ground. She had a weird sensation they were flying. It was impossible to tell whether they were over land or sea. This giant had some sort of magic in his legs. The wind rushing against Sophie’s face became so strong that she had to duck down again into the blanket to prevent her head from being blown away.”

Okay, so that may be a bit of an exaggeration. I don’t exactly want to fly across the map. We aren’t that ready but my excitement matches the exhilaration found in that passage and it would be nice to have the chance to move a bit faster than tortoise pace.

We have teetered on the edge of telling more people about our Tiny Human Project but for some reason I am firmly planted in the idea that we need to be officially doing something before we starting advertising our choices to the world. It doesn’t even have to be the classes yet, even just an orientation meeting. I’d like something to happen to make it real, more real than a few phone calls and a form letter in the mail. I was told to wait until the woman at the agency contacts us but I’ve decided to leave the tortoise in the dust and reach out. For now it’s just more frustration knowing that this is just the beginning. The two months that I’ve been trying to reach out to get started are quite possibly two more months that my someday child had to live without safety and stability. Itching to go…

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One thought on “Running Shoes

  1. Oh how I understand your feelings! There is a place for the tortoise and a place for the hare (and I have a hard time decided when it is time for which!). It is long (as I know) but I feel it will be well worth it!

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